Missing What You Never Had
by Galaxina-the-Seedrian
Summary: Every night it had been the same, strange dream. Phineas didn't know when or how it started, and it was so often that he'd begun to wonder what was real and what wasn't. And it didn't help that there was always just one difference between reality and fiction; a difference he didn't really want to decipher. (for Marissa Flynn; HAPPY BIRTHDAY)


**Alright, so, this is for my goodily good friend, Marissa Flynn~! :D For as we know, this is the day of her birth . This isn't gonna be anything long; just something short, sweet…and…maybe a little sad. Don't try to put the fiend known as LOGIC into this fic.**

 **THIS IS A BIRTHDAY FIC!**

 **YOU DARE DENY WRITERS THEIR HAPPINESS IN THEIR BIRTHDAY FICS?!**

 **No you do not, unless you're a butt-face. ^^ So if I've gotten characters OOC, know that it's intentional for the sake of the…"universe" I'm writing for.**

 **Phineas and Ferb are owned by Dan Povenmire and Jeff "Swampy" Marsh**

 **Marissa Flynn (OC) is owned by Marissa Flynn (Person/Friend/Confidant)**

 **I OWN ONLY THIS STORY! :D**

 **Enjoy~.**

 **P/F/P/F**

 **Missing What You Never Had**

 **(~)**

It was such an odd dream, to be perfectly honest, as consistent as it was. The day would play out almost exactly how their Summer days usually went…almost…but still, such exact detail in a dream like this was unheard of. From when they woke up, to when they slept, to the very catchphrases that he started to notice how often people used them. In fact, Phineas never realized how much he spent his time in the very backyard his creations came to life until these dreams started to occur, and ever since then the years passed on and he's been plagued with them.

Every night it had been the same, strange dream. Phineas didn't know when or how it started, and it was so often that he'd begun to wonder what was real and what wasn't. And it didn't help that there was always just one difference between reality and fiction; a difference he didn't really want to decipher. Currently, it had been a struggle to tell if he had been dreaming up certain events because of this.

His friends and family started to worry after a while. Phineas seemed to keep asking them questions: "Did we really build that rollercoaster? I can't seem to recall…time travel…oh yeah, now I remember, thanks Isabella" or something along the lines of that.

But that wasn't really a problem. Sometimes everyone on this earth will question the fabric of reality; would wonder if we'd actually have done these things. Sure, Phineas took it to the extreme, but that's because _he's Phineas_. He always takes things to the extreme. No. What bothered them was another question that confused them.

"Where's Marissa?"

You mean Vanessa, they would ask? No, no, it was definitely Marissa. And he would describe her in perfect detail:

"You know, Marissa, she's like…Candace's twin? I think…what, you don't remember her? She's been around from the beginning…right?"

At first it was easy to explain to Phineas that Marissa wasn't…there. That was when the dreams were far and few. And sure, he asked again, having seemed to forgotten that he asked in the first place, but again this was Phineas; he was weird, Candace would point out constantly to get his annoying little friends to cool their jets.

After they started happening every night, though, it became apparent that it served as a problem.

"No, no, you've got it wrong; she's my older sister, but she isn't Candace's twin. I tell her everything now. You should meet her, she's really cool."

He had accepted that Marissa wasn't real by now (at least everyone hoped so), but he considered her a friend regardless. His reasoning for befriending something that wasn't even real was that he feared he'd hurt her feelings. He clearly didn't realize how strange that statement was, and brushed off everyone's look of confusion with a "they'll understand later".

Sometimes when he talked to himself, he was really talking to Marissa, like she was his imaginary friend. Other times Phineas would look into a mirror and claim to be seeing her where his reflection was, though no one else seemed to be able to see her; after trying to point it out for the first time, though, he knew better than to bring it up again, but Ferb (and to a lesser extent Candace) knew "who" Phineas was discussing strange matters with. Ferb seemed the most concerned, not out of jealousy for he was above that, but because Phineas seemed a little too old to be having imaginary friends anyway, even if they used their mechanical abilities for childish endeavors. The fact that Phineas was treating this illusion to be a real person was starting to weird everyone out.

Phineas didn't even stop there; the most recent machine was probably the most frightening piece of equipment they had ever seen. It wasn't really the look of the machine, since it looked like a glorified box with lights flickering and a door to walk through it. It was the concept, and why Phineas decided to go with the activity.

"Last night she told me that she wanted to be real. I want her dream to come true."

Had he forgotten that she _was the dream?!_

No one wanted to argue with Phineas, that this plan of his actually wasn't going to work, mainly because they had been proven wrong countless times for doubting him in the first place. Ferb had always thought "well, has he been wrong before?" on literally every occasion, yet the fact remained that this was going beyond their competence. It was going beyond the mental capabilities as well; a being, that being this "Marissa", that wasn't real had somehow gained the knowledge and _wanted desperately_ to become a reality. Something felt eerily wrong...

Ferb felt absolutely awful about sabotaging Phineas' "mission", but…he would never know. And even though Phineas was utterly disappointed that the machine disappeared sooner than usual, so soon that he didn't even get to use it, he didn't seem too saddened about it. They went on their day as per usual, and everyone thought that everything was going to be fine. But then, he tried again, this time with another device.

He had modified their Dimensional Remote to reach into his own subconscious so that he could bring Marissa out into the open. When he had told Marissa of this plan, Phineas remembered her being so very excited. So much so that she lifted him up into the air and hugged him tight. They slept under his tree, and that's where he remembered waking up the next morning (did I mention that he seemed to have a weird sleepwalking habit after these dreams started occurring? The last time he woke up at Isabella's house).

Ferb did the same thing he did before, and made sure the device didn't work. What was he supposed to do?! What if they accidentally let out his id, or something? If Candace's id was as violent as it was when they first saw it, imagine Phineas' id as he was at this delusional stance? Phineas calm reaction to the failed attempt started to bother Ferb and the others.

Because then he tried again…

…and again…

…and again…

…and again, and again, and again, and-

"Phineas, what the heck are you doing?!"

Phineas was always happy to explain what he had planned.

"Well, I decided Ferb and I-," he didn't notice a 'Don't bring me into this' look on Ferb's concerned expression, "-are going to make a mirror that allows us to-."

The boy was surprised when his dear sister ultimately cut him off in the midst of his explanation. "Look, Phineas," Candace spoke flatly, "At first I thought this wasn't something that your little goofy friends shouldn't be complaining about, but this has gotten out of hand."

Phineas chuckled. "What do you mean?"

Candace decided to be the bearer of bad news to Phineas, to be his raincheck. The very thing Phineas didn't want to face at this point was reality, and Candace was all for that resolution if it meant putting an end to this. Phineas tried to reason with his well-meaning older sister that anything was possible and all that junk, but Candace laid it to him straight.

"You _can't_ just make something that doesn't exist real! You can't make your stupid little 'friend' exist, no matter what you do! Even the Mysterious Force is against you doing it!"

No one knew exactly what Candace meant by "mysterious force", but it was clear that they seemed to agree with her other than Phineas himself.

And then Phineas simply said that Candace was being naïve and even ignorant for coming up with such close-minded assumptions. The tone of voice he used, which he didn't realize sounded a bit cross, was enough to make Candace's blood boil. It was sass that Phineas used scarcely, but used often enough under the right levels of situation. Simple little quips that people often forgot about, and would usually go in one ear and out the other. Sometimes, though, he'd hurt someone's feelings, or piss them off like he did with Candace.

He really did need to stop talking so much.

As Phineas' relationship seemed to deteriorate as time went on, not that Phineas seemed to notice instead, Phineas suddenly began to notice some things. For whatever reason, one night Phineas seemed to have quite enough of whatever it was, and snapped at Ferb for getting in his way. Ferb wondered how Phineas figured out what he was doing, and Phineas immediately gave an answer.

Marissa had _told him._

He had never even seen Ferb doing it until after Marissa had told him about several times when Phineas' attempts seemed to fail.

It was bizarre to say the least, and Ferb was even more worried by now. Could ghosts possess someone like in those weird movies kids nowadays made fun of? Regardless, he and Candace both decided to tell their parents about Phineas' problem. Linda wouldn't have listened to Candace's word alone, so Ferb being there to back her up led to some worry from both parents.

They decided that they needed to talk to Phineas about it as well. But he wasn't even there. It wasn't like he had gone over to a friend's house either; it was more along the lines of Phineas climbing out of the window and currently ran down the streets to who-knows-where. How he was able to accomplish such a thing was beyond their parents' knowledge, though Ferb was certain that Phineas was wearing his airbag shoes that they built that day.

Could it be that Phineas knew what was going to happen? Could this Marissa see into the future? Could _Phineas_ see into the future because of this? Perhaps it was just a hunch…perhaps…

Immediately the family went out in a direct search. Hours passed, and they couldn't find him anywhere. All that was on their minds was the question of what could possibly be on the boy's mind, and if he was safe wherever he was.

 **(~)**

" _Phineas! Phineas, you came!"_

 _Phineas entered the park with a grand smile. Before him was a girl who looked much like his older sister Candace, yet unlike the long auburn-haired teen with an annoyed disposition that was as deep as her dark blue eyes, this girl had short dark brown hair, and a pair of green eyes that were protected by her glasses. She wore a pink shirt, a black skirt, and black shoes with pink laces. She wore a more positive expression than Candace would, yet Phineas couldn't help but love both of his sisters._

 _Even though only one of them was (technically) truly his sister…_

" _Hey, Marissa," Phineas was greeted to an immediate embrace by the taller of the two; he hugged back tightly, "I'm sorry to say that with all that's been happening I almost forgot about today."_

 _Marissa's smile marred a little, but she seemed assuring as well. "Don't worry about it," she said, "I understand. I'm just glad you remembered."_

 _Phineas gave to what Marissa saw as the most adorable smile the boy could muster. Marissa giggled. "Happy birthday, Marissa," the boy said as he pulled away from the hug and grabbed both of his friend's hands into his own._

 _Phineas didn't really know when Marissa's birthday was; he just seemed to recall meeting Marissa on this very day. Had a year really passed by now, or maybe…it had been several years by now? Phineas couldn't seem to recall his exact age, the dream world sort of making his mind too hazy to really help. But he was able to firmly grasp the world now, and he knew his exact intentions._

" _So," Marissa gave a coy smile, "You said you wanted to give me a surprise…what is it?"_

 _Marissa was definitely spoiled, Phineas realized, but ever since they met she was too cute for him to deny. How could someone who looked exactly like his sister be less terrifying…uh…not that he feared his sister. Sometimes, like when he and Ferb somehow split Candace into two Candace's, she could be a little…overwhelming._

 _Phineas crossed his arms. "Now, that's a surprise, Marissa my dear," he said, "We've got plenty of time."_

 _Marissa smirked flatly. "As if," she said, "Our meetings are usually about five minutes' tops."_

" _Not this time," Phineas grinned, tapping his head, "Notice anything different about me?"_

 _Marissa gave her small, tiny friend another survey and finally noticed a band around Phineas' head, which was only thick enough to cover his strangely place freckles. The headband looked normal to anyone else, even to Marissa, but what she failed to notice was the ever so small electric currents riding on the seams of the device. All she knew was that Phineas had done something to the seemingly ordinary piece of fabric._

" _What is it?" Marissa asked._

" _It's a Sleep-Band," Phineas explained, "It lets me remain asleep until I wake myself up."_

" _And…how are you going to-?"_

" _-You dare lack faith in my abilities of coming prepared?"_

 _Marissa giggled once more at Phineas' playful glare. "I apologize," she said, "It's just…it almost sounds like you…put yourself…in a coma."_

 _Phineas waved her off. "No, no," he said, "Unless the band is damaged, I doubt I'll be stuck here. Besides, if something goes wrong, Ferb'll find me and take the band off."_

" _Will that work?"_

" _Pretty sure it will."_

 _Marissa proceeded to float in the air and craned her body in such a way that allowed her to get into Phineas' face. "So…you and I can talk more?" she smiled, "That's nice."_

" _Yeah," Phineas' teeth showed, "It is."_

 _A mischievous smirk came on Marissa's face. "So…how's Isabella, hm? Have you scored yet, little bachelor?"_

 _Phineas smile remained as he started doing something with his headband. "That's it, I'm leaving," he spoke in such a jolly tone that you wouldn't be able to tell that he was even annoyed._

 _Marissa immediately retaliated by tackle hugging Phineas into the air and started spinning him around, letting his arms flail as the boy screamed in laughter that they both shared. Their thoughts were in sync, joy was one, and their smile was equally bright. Maybe it was because this was Phineas' dream, and he preferred it that this person shared his opinions; yet he knew that she had her own thoughts as well. Why else would they debate so much about things, and why would Marissa have such a distaste for things that he enjoyed, and why would Phineas even call Marissa 'boring' whenever she'd ignore him while she was drawing who knows what?_

 _And her drawings…oh her drawings…she was a natural. It literally would come to life and create the world around them. In the little time Phineas and Marissa would spend together, they would craft places, beings, and stories for them to enact. And they would remain as they were when Phineas got back, unless Marissa added or removed something while he was gone._

 _She even had her own house, which they built on the clouds. Phineas always liked the thought of flight, for whatever reason (he had mentioned once before that he dreamt of himself having wings). The building was a large palace, which they could easily access by merely flying in; and only_ they _could get in, because this was_ their _special place. Not even other illusions that Phineas could make could enter the doors of the palace unless they saw fit._

 _Although Phineas would be happy to bring the rest of his friends and family to their palace of clouds one day, Marissa was a little nervous about it. She was hurt by the way they were treating her, even if she knew they were right for thinking the way they did._

 _After their banter, Phineas and Marissa resided on the clouds and watched the sun as they talked and discussed their day. Phineas mentioned the air-bag shoes that could double and super-bounce-shoes while Marissa spoke of the drawings she made. Phineas couldn't help but feel a little sad for Marissa. She was so alone here…_

… _but not for long, Phineas thought. This made his resolve all the stronger._

 _Hours seemed to pass, though Phineas and Marissa felt that it only had been a few minutes. Regardless, Marissa's patience had run dry, and she grabbed Phineas by the arm, wearing a huge, excited grin. "Soooooooo, are you gonna give me the surprise or not?" Marissa sang; did I mention she could sing? Like a bloody angel?_

" _You're really pushing it, you know?" Phineas smirked, "So impatient."_

" _Hey, it's_ my _birthday, you stinker," Marissa stated, "So cough it up. Now."_

 _Phineas sighed. "Alright, alright…I'll tell you," he said, noting the odd frown Marissa gave, "So…my next attempt-."_

" _-Oh, Phineas," Marissa shook her head, "You've tried so, so hard, that I'd hate for you to waste your time further just for me."_

" _No, no, listen," Phineas said, "I think I figured out the problem."_

" _You mean besides your brother sabotaging your machines?"_

 _Phineas was sure that Marissa didn't mean to sound so angered towards Ferb; he was sure they'd get along once they met each other._

" _Yeah, besides that," Phineas admitted, "He really means well…" noting the uncomfortableness, Phineas got back on track, "Anyway as I was saying, the problem was that I had found a way to get you out in the physical world, but I hadn't thought about how to remove you from the mental world without drastically changing you."_

 _Marissa tilted her head as she listened to Phineas' explanation. "So I thought why not bring you out mentally?" he said, "So…I figured out a way!"_

" _And…that would be…?"_

 _Phineas reached into his pocket and took out yet another headband, which made Marissa gasp. He smiled up at her once more. "This band is different from mine," he said, "If you put it on, you'll form a physical body…you know…hopefully. And once you do, we can figure out how to keep your body stable."_

 _Marissa carefully took the headband from Phineas and examined it. She blinked. "So…I'll be…like…a hologram?" she asked._

 _Phineas nodded. "A hologram with mass," he said, "You'll still be able to feel and grab things, but without the headband you'll be completely nonexistent."_

 _Marissa's eyes squinted as she further examined the band. "And you're sure this'll work?" she asked skeptically._

" _Almost positive," Phineas gave a confident nod._

" _Almost…?" Marissa asked, her frown deepening._

 _Phineas chuckled nervously. "Yeah…almost…" he looked up, coughing awkwardly as silence befell the two for a few minutes, "…that cloud looks like an old turtle."_

 _Marissa smiled softly as she looked up. "How can you tell if its old?" she asked, "Turtles always look old."_

" _Yeah, but that one looks way wrinklier," Phineas said, "And there's a pirate rabbit chasing after it."_

" _I see a monkey with a wrench building a banana-inator," Marissa laughed, "Kinda reminds me of you."_

 _Phineas pushed Marissa, who began to laugh again. Phineas looked back up at the clouds and pointed. "There's the entire continent of Asia!"_

" _The leaning tower of Pisa finally falling over!"_

" _A nuclear explosion!"_

" _That's just a regular cloud…"_

"… _Not if you use your imagination!"_

 _Phineas' arms shot up as he made a "kapow" sound. Marissa giggled more along with the boy with her and they ended up laughing so hard that they fell back onto the fluffiness of the clouds they lied on. Phineas and Marissa looked at each other again, feeling at ease. Yet, Marissa frowned as she pulled back up the headband still in her grasp. She stared at it._

" _What if it doesn't work?" Marissa asked._

 _Phineas' smiled weakened but remained. "You'll remain here," he said, "But…I'll be able to come and see you more with my headband…" he sighed, "Unless it disappears or something."_

 _Marissa stared down at the ring of fabric blankly. "You…know you don't have to do it if you don't want to," Phineas said, "I wouldn't want to leave this place either if I had the choice, heh."_

 _Yet Marissa's eyes seemed to share the same resolve as Phineas. The world they shared in his subconscious was wonderful and extraordinary; but it was nothing compared to the freedom of reality, in Marissa's eyes, no, in her heart at least. Marissa gave an intense look to the headband before lifting it up to her temples, lightly tapping her forehead against it as she made her decision. Phineas watched carefully in case Marissa were to make the wrong move with his machine._

 _Marissa placed the band around her forehead, and a light flashed on._

 **(~)**

"Phineas?! PHINEAS?!"

Ferb and Candace both screamed out while their parents desperately sought out in another direction of the city. Candace had never seen Ferb look so scared in his whole life. No longer did the green-haired child wear his blank look, and in its place was a look of pure fear. Fear for his brother; fear for his brother's life and sanity. Candace couldn't help but share those emotions. She was the older sister, after all; she had to have those feelings toward her younger siblings. It was practically a law within her very being.

They had searched for a few hours, and still nothing. They were starting to think maybe they should get help from more people. Everyone in town loved Phineas and Ferb; surely they'd be concerned.

Candace felt her eyes widened as Ferb yelled out, "I FOUND HIM!"

Ferb pointed at a tree in the park, where Phineas lied fast asleep. The two siblings ran towards the resting figure as fast as they could, and started to slow down as they noticed another oddity. It was like a flash of light, and then nothing. It felt like reality was bending in an unfathomable form. When the two arrived, Ferb ready to pull his brother into a hug and Candace ready to wake Phineas up so that she can give him an earful, they stopped and stared at the sight.

There laid Phineas, gently breathing as he leaned on a girl they had never met before.

They were smiling peacefully, and they dreamed.

 **A/N:**

 **That was fun to write. :3**

 **I hope you enjoyed, Marissa Flynn! Happy birthday, girl! I pray that you live a long life, and that it fulfills your hopes and dreams. I love you so much. (virtual hugs and cookies~!)**

 **To all you weirdos out there…shut up, their siblings. Sickos.**

 **And as for the rest of you, and hope you all have a swell day; please, read, review, and other good stuff. Keep smiling.**

 **-GTS**


End file.
